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[Feb. 22nd, 2006|12:13 pm] |
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Well well well where do I start It makes me so mad that I cant be honest with someone and then all they do is end up getting mad I think I can actually say im done trying fuck that I mean I love and what not but shit man fuck it shit happenes for a reason I guess and I feel like if I dont try then we wouldnt even talk and it should not be like that but whatever man I was just being honest and if you can except my honesty well then I guess that really does suck for both of us because I love you but whatever... So my mom looks horrid she is getting worse by the day she looks old now im realyly getting scared but what the fuck am i suppossd to do beside just be there fore her damn this really does suck im sad damn... But I guess |
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[Feb. 13th, 2006|11:21 pm] |
- I feel LONELY this sucksssss
- LAst year on Valentines I was with the best guy ever watching Mean GIRLS enjoying my flowers and ballons
- This Valentines ill be alone while the boy of my dreams is soing the same for someone else
- THIS SUCKSS
- I thogh I had a friend but damn I guess I was wrong
- You know I really gave up on friends they all suck I got myself and my mom and brother etc
- I miss him
- I have said repeatendly on here how im over him its not that i miss him im just lonely in general
- Ive lost 17 pounds in 3 weeks which is great I guess that one good thing
- I hate the fact that she cant get over that boy but thats her sucks to be here
- I hate her friend she is dumb I left my friends for her and ho ends up loosing me but thats what i get
- fuck everyone thats the rule in life I have learned the hard way I have no regrets cause oh GURRRL I have learned and had fun on the way!
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[Feb. 7th, 2006|10:42 pm] |
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So what can i say me and my mom got in a fight AGAIN!!! whats new right so I just left just to make things easier on everyones GEEEZ this really does suck damn i never knew life was so crazy well not life but the shit it throws at you really im staying with Brends I actually dont really know what I would do with out her and all the love and help she has been providing for me GOSH I just wish I can move out already i just need a damn fucking car then after that i can stay wherever the fuck I want damn this really does at times like this it makes me miss the best person in this world and no im not going to say any names but i ptretty much think everyones knows including that certain person damn it damn it damn it this suck I have to do things diffrently and not how ive been doing them which like I said sucks I mean Im doing what I am doing to prove a facking point that I dont need my mom she doesnt do all that much for me except put a head over my roof and feed me negative shit damn oh well I guess this is were I cut it short before I go on and on forever Pray for me I nee dall the help in this WORLD <3( FUCK this ..... ) |
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[Feb. 1st, 2006|10:29 am] |
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Well Well where do I start Not drinking was ok for awhile and I didnt care but GEEEZ I think im having withdrawls even though I think im to young to have those but ah o well I miss some people but I dont miss some people haha i miss DRINKING and doing loud and obnoxious things hahha but it will all pay off when Im all great and pretty and not fat anymore geez hehe i have lost 11 pounds in 2 weeks which is just GREAT hehe Im excited So you know who you are when I say I thought we were only going to be friends.... and then I try talkingto you and you totally ignore me or whatever it was you did I mean i think it took me long enough to know that we were only going to be friends but i did and thats all i ask from you geez if that i mean if not thats cool too i am ok with it i just thought i would be cool if we were only friends i mean i did like you a lot and whatever happned happened i still want to be your friend but whatever I guess thats all in your hands Im still bothering with you because I care i dont know why bit I do! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 11th, 2006|12:23 pm] |
Life is a little more than I can handle but this time around I have learned ta not stress and ta just let it pass it will eventually get better I mean no matter what I say or do it actually doesnt really matter so I should just save my breath thats it no more I give up HONESTLY sorry I love you and all but im tired of these little games they are fucking lame and stupid Oh I wantt o talk one day and the next i dont thats stupid but you know what thats you im just tired of it you let me know when you want to talk I GIVE UP and about the bois in my life right now it actually sucks all I seem to have now are just bois that I call BOOTY CALLS thats about it and I think I should stop that and soon but then again I have said that how many times Ah I HATE him but I LOVE him damn it whatever whatever whatever whatever whatever dshfskrdhgoisjrgerwkjgowhegeorwglewrkhg I have found myself doings things I once had never even thought of doing but its ok I mean i eventually have to go through it right? or should I stop while im ahead....I mean its not all that bad but do I really want to THATS HORRID THAT IM ACTUALLY THINKING TWICE ABOUT IT if you would hvae hit me with this subject about two months ago my answer wold be COMPLETELY diffrent but whatever UH......... |
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[Dec. 26th, 2005|01:57 am] |
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DAMN life is a little crazy haha it throws so many fucking obsticles at you its ridicules damn i know your not supposed to regret things but gee wiz that took a huge part of me and then for what honestly damn i should be ashamed of myself but everyone says the joke is not on you its not but man yeah i guess i just was blind but not i dunno damn it hurt like i cant stop talking about it but shit i guess shit happens and you learn from it TOOK ME A LONG time but i figured it out ur lame and i should have known since the beginning but no stupid me had to go for what she thought was right but nope everyone was right about you and the person that likes e i treat like a major idiot damn it whats wrong with me I HATE U! |
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[Nov. 9th, 2005|11:21 pm] |
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SAME OLD STUFF except for the BOI in my life well its kinda the same old stuff I thought things would be weird or diffrent and nope same stuff except I see him as a friend and i guess a friend only i kinda get the impression that he wants to be more than just friends but i really dont want to get into that same old scratched record for what so he can hurt me again and me cry over him again but to tell you the truth I kinda kinda feel like the tables have turned and thats kinda a good thing but I would never cause anyone the pain he caused me because man o man that was super harsh and I cried and stressed over him for like EVER! I owe that to myself ta be happy and me and him just to be FRIENDS im not gunna lie when I hear his name I twitch or smile but thats the past and it was great while it lasted but I guess thats about it! |
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[Oct. 30th, 2005|01:12 am] |
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Well its Saturday and Im home being lame and tired work had DRAINED me to the MAX our COSTUMES WERE awesome HAH PEOPL ETHOUGHT WE WERE Nelly Players Bois sports girls ETC when in reality we were baseball players wow haha too funny im tired tired tired yesterday was just not what I expected it ta be im excited I get paid friday YAY! |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 18th, 2005|11:08 am] |
Lat night was amazing I got ta spend time with edy and alix we smoked cron damn man o man that stuff is a little crazy for me man o man I dont think ive ever been so HIGH! thanks for inviting bois! Other than that yesterday was ok me and kristina went ta daves which was ok I guess im CRAZZZZY like that heheh then a certain someone was tellin me how he tried killing himself and what not and I feel specail cuz he actually talks to me about these things im just scared of hurting him and not being there for him I <3 U! I hate the way me and him feel the same way about society and how fucking screwed up it is and how people are so fucking lame and what not you know Im gunna start chilling alone and suround myself with people that actually FUCKING care if I would DIE tomorrow or something of that sort whatever oh well shit happens I just dont understand how some people can be so fucking forgiving that makes me mad but whatever that none of my business right right Soo seeing that boi yesterday was fun I had fun hehe he put a smile on my face I actually dont like him butI guess there will always be some sort of connection there YAY hes all super in ta marijuana which is GREAT!
Makes me mad that in one certain situation im the fucking bad person for going with a boi that liked me and I liked him oh but its ok for me ta be the bad one even though she was fucking with him when I liked him OH BUT IM THE WORST BEST FRIEND ever WTF is that dood seriously WTF Uh that fucking pisses me off sheah whatever Im not even gunna get into that whatever |
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[Oct. 16th, 2005|01:02 am] |
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so um this is the part where i fucking shut my self out im fucking tired of it all tired of having "friends" that are gunna screw me over peopl ethat say "AW ___ I would never fucking do that to you" and what the fuck do they do fuck me over you know what its fucking cool though dont fucking expect shit from me no more nice forgivning me because what happened today is a reminder in my head that there is NO SUCH THING AS FRIENDS like my cousin said all you have is ur fucking family thats fucking sad but the fucking truth FUCK EVERYONE Im tired of this fucking shit so this is where i become the bitter bitch that doesnt give a fuck about anyone but hereself seemd like everyone is like that why cant I right!FUCK MY SO CALLED FUCKING FRIENDS IM OUT! |
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| Long time not UPDATE! |
[Oct. 10th, 2005|04:18 pm] |
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Ok so like last week I was so fraustrated and didnt know what to think this week wow I feel so so so much better I love it i know what has to be done and whats going on im not blind to any of these situations i know whats up weather i care or not is the diffrence! i love everyone i just didnt know how to make evryone happy but by telling my friend some advise I needed to hear is GREAT! i cant make others happy until im happy and wow im pretty happy not to the max but im getting there i have no strings attached with any guys NO LONG YESSS nore nathaniel or edy and I love it! i do i do!nothing is stoppping me now im m y own person i know whats up |
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| I didn't know cool girls go to shows (that's CUTE!) |
[Mar. 24th, 2005|06:40 pm] |
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I just find it funny how all these cool people go to shows now no names COughCOugh the girl that I absolutly no hate but dislike A LOT! hehe but yeah I guess that's all for now but not forever! |
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| <3 |
[Mar. 4th, 2005|06:02 pm] |
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Well so much has happened in a time span of about 89713210657 days and well I guess it's just me finding myself and who I really am and who my friends are and to tell you the truth it has been so fun! Well thats all for now but not forever! |
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